From time to time, stories sound remarkable on paper, making you turn the page like it’s the only thing you remember to do, sucking you in like a vortex of astonishment and complete addiction to such words of beauty. Such words may not make sense when seen or heard, in fact may not be entertaining, but frustrating by how far off they can be. Remarkably, 'Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief' has made a monumental accomplishment, as the most disappointing movie based on a best seller in the year 2010. It takes quite a lot of different factors to make a good movie, such as acting and plot, but clearly someone picked up the wrong manual. Honestly, if anybody has ever read the actual book (thank you Rick Riordan) you’ll find quite impressive story. Contradictory to such a marvelous tale, the story on the big screen was almost as disappointing as finding a penny and later not being able to take it off your finger because of the gum on it. In fact, the information presented on the big screen doesn’t answer questions, but only raises more as newcomers to the series try to follow poorly described complex situations.
In the beginning of the movie you’ll find two men on top of what appears to be an enormous building, later discovered to be the Empire State building. These two men are later exposed to be Zeus (Sean Bean) and Poseidon (Kevin McKidd), ancient Gods in a modern world. And as you try to understand the concept of such things happening since it was told that when the Christian God came along all the Greek Gods died, they give you small and confusing bits of information. To wrap up all of what they say on that roof top before gargantuan silver letters are suddenly in the sky and telling you the title of the movie: Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman) is Poseidon’s son, Zeus’ lightning bolt was stolen and he thinks Percy took it, the Gods are not to take power from one another, and they hint at a possible war.
This is all that you learn before you are taken to the bottom of a pool where a boy (Percy) is sitting underwater quite comfortably. After a minute of waiting, the boy goes up to the surface to meet up with his seemingly disabled friend, Grover (Brandon T. Jackson), and they chat about how long he can hold his breath underwater (about ten minutes). Then, they go on a class field trip where Percy, the dyslexic and ADHD teen, looks at a statue and can suddenly read ancient Greek. Now, before you’re probably confused, but don’t worry because in about three minutes his teacher brings him to another room and bursts out as a monster. Surely this can’t be possible.
But wait, there’s more! It’s not freaky enough that his teacher (who is apparently an ancient Greek monster called a fury) tries to kill him, his other teacher (who is as immobilized as Grover) bursts in with Grover and fights off the fury. The fury/teacher bursts out of the window and his non-fury teacher talks to him in a strict tone and hands him a pen, telling him that it will protect him. Okay, let’s stop right there. Now so far, the movie seems like something any dreamy teen or drunkard could accomplish creating. But the fun never dies with this movie, for you’re not even halfway done. Soon Percy is taken on a wild ride with Grover and his mother (Catherine Keener) when they go on the adventure of taking Percy to Camp Half-Blood. By this time, Percy knows that he is the son of Poseidon. On the journey there, a Minotaur comes out from nowhere and attacks the car. When the car is upside-down, after he takes off his pants, we find that Grover is not a disabled teenage boy just trying to make it along, he’s a fit Satyr (half man-half goat creature). Naturally, untrained, inexperienced, and unfocused Percy Jackson slays the Minotaur (who somehow bursts into dust and takes Percy’s mother with him).
It turns out that Percy is not the only offspring of a God and mortal hooking up, there’s a whole camp dedicated to the children (how charitable). There Percy meets his new friends Luke (Jake Abel) and Annabeth (Alexandra Daddario). Oh and Grover just happens to mention that the dyslexia is so he can read Ancient Greek and the ADHD is his "fighter’s energy", who knew right? He also sees his "disabled" teacher, who is actually Cheiron (Pierce Brosnan), a centaur. After a game of extreme capture the flag, Percy is contacted by Hades (Steve Coogan), who took his mother because everybody thinks he took Zeus’ bolt and he wants it for his own doings.
Percy doesn’t have the bolt. So what would any other totally average demigod son-of-Poseidon teenage boy do but go on a quest? Of course he’s accompanied by Grover and Annabeth, with help from Luke. And what is this quest really about? Getting pearls so they can go to the Underworld without the bolt to try to convince the most heartless man in existence to give him his mother back with nothing in return. Clearly somebody took something out of their cabinet, drank it, wandered into their living room, picked up a random book, and wrote the script for 'Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief'; because that is the only plausible reason that such a promising movie can fall so flat. Likewise, if the plot doesn’t have you running out of the theater, the appearance of the film will.
The dialog of the characters is fine, sometimes emotionless enough to make a clown cry, but always easy to understand. Like when Percy saw his mother get taken away, he shouldn’t be fine, he should be crying like someone stole his mom. The images shown are informative, not always connective to the story. Showing me the statue of Perseus and telling me that Percy was named after him wasn’t quite interesting, perhaps a clue that he’d be killing Medusa, but nothing I’d brag about at the dinner table. Graphics were a little distracting, and about the quality of a high school students’ project (especially that chunky hydra). Transitions of the different placing were awkward like a rollercoaster that only goes forward and back. The tone of the story was rushed, the story moving so fast and confusing that you might need a baggie by your side if you’re to get through such a tragic movie. The lighting was fine, but then again even a monkey can screw in a light bulb. Music seemed original, but about as complicated as a 100-piece puzzle. As a result as a less than mediocre setting, the actors had to be the light that pulls you into the bug zapper.
Okay honestly, Logan Lerman was quite a piece of eye-candy, like a delicious cherry red candy apple surrounded by those disgusting off-brand candies that you wouldn’t even want to donate to the food shelf. I quite enjoyed seeing him, if only he had acting skills. A good summer in a play with good directors could probably fix it. It’d have to be intense work, I suggest Winnie-the-Pooh. Alexandra Daddario I cannot grant such words. Sure, she’s beautiful like a model, but she can’t emote. She’s like a walking mannequin as she converses with Percy by the poolside in Vegas. As she was running from Medusa I questioned if she was distracted by the fact that her hair is brown and Annabeth is blonde. On the other hand, Brandon T. Jackson was emotional, but most of the time the same two emotions. Grover was either scared or determined, all day, everyday. The rest of the cast I don’t care to mention because they aren’t around enough to even bother with how much work they needed. It’s all about the main three, how predictable. Not even Harry Potter excluded that much (Malfoy, Dumbledore, Snape, Dobby, etc.). Yet there’s still an air about this movie that screams… Five dollar bin.
If you need a cheap laugh and an easy way to kill an hour, you could watch 'Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief'. Or, a much more entertaining idea, you could go read the book. It might take more time, but at least you won’t have to see the most horrifying sight ever… a hydra made completely of janitor power. Which raises the question, if the hydra had five heads (represented by the five janitors) when the new heads grow back, do you have more janitors? But I digress. To answer the question that was probably the reason you read this article, yes you should go watch this movie. To pay for Logan’s acting lessons.
Read more at Buzzle: http://www.buzzle.com/articles/percy-jackson-and-the-olympians-the-lightning-thief.html
In the beginning of the movie you’ll find two men on top of what appears to be an enormous building, later discovered to be the Empire State building. These two men are later exposed to be Zeus (Sean Bean) and Poseidon (Kevin McKidd), ancient Gods in a modern world. And as you try to understand the concept of such things happening since it was told that when the Christian God came along all the Greek Gods died, they give you small and confusing bits of information. To wrap up all of what they say on that roof top before gargantuan silver letters are suddenly in the sky and telling you the title of the movie: Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman) is Poseidon’s son, Zeus’ lightning bolt was stolen and he thinks Percy took it, the Gods are not to take power from one another, and they hint at a possible war.
This is all that you learn before you are taken to the bottom of a pool where a boy (Percy) is sitting underwater quite comfortably. After a minute of waiting, the boy goes up to the surface to meet up with his seemingly disabled friend, Grover (Brandon T. Jackson), and they chat about how long he can hold his breath underwater (about ten minutes). Then, they go on a class field trip where Percy, the dyslexic and ADHD teen, looks at a statue and can suddenly read ancient Greek. Now, before you’re probably confused, but don’t worry because in about three minutes his teacher brings him to another room and bursts out as a monster. Surely this can’t be possible.
But wait, there’s more! It’s not freaky enough that his teacher (who is apparently an ancient Greek monster called a fury) tries to kill him, his other teacher (who is as immobilized as Grover) bursts in with Grover and fights off the fury. The fury/teacher bursts out of the window and his non-fury teacher talks to him in a strict tone and hands him a pen, telling him that it will protect him. Okay, let’s stop right there. Now so far, the movie seems like something any dreamy teen or drunkard could accomplish creating. But the fun never dies with this movie, for you’re not even halfway done. Soon Percy is taken on a wild ride with Grover and his mother (Catherine Keener) when they go on the adventure of taking Percy to Camp Half-Blood. By this time, Percy knows that he is the son of Poseidon. On the journey there, a Minotaur comes out from nowhere and attacks the car. When the car is upside-down, after he takes off his pants, we find that Grover is not a disabled teenage boy just trying to make it along, he’s a fit Satyr (half man-half goat creature). Naturally, untrained, inexperienced, and unfocused Percy Jackson slays the Minotaur (who somehow bursts into dust and takes Percy’s mother with him).
It turns out that Percy is not the only offspring of a God and mortal hooking up, there’s a whole camp dedicated to the children (how charitable). There Percy meets his new friends Luke (Jake Abel) and Annabeth (Alexandra Daddario). Oh and Grover just happens to mention that the dyslexia is so he can read Ancient Greek and the ADHD is his "fighter’s energy", who knew right? He also sees his "disabled" teacher, who is actually Cheiron (Pierce Brosnan), a centaur. After a game of extreme capture the flag, Percy is contacted by Hades (Steve Coogan), who took his mother because everybody thinks he took Zeus’ bolt and he wants it for his own doings.
Percy doesn’t have the bolt. So what would any other totally average demigod son-of-Poseidon teenage boy do but go on a quest? Of course he’s accompanied by Grover and Annabeth, with help from Luke. And what is this quest really about? Getting pearls so they can go to the Underworld without the bolt to try to convince the most heartless man in existence to give him his mother back with nothing in return. Clearly somebody took something out of their cabinet, drank it, wandered into their living room, picked up a random book, and wrote the script for 'Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief'; because that is the only plausible reason that such a promising movie can fall so flat. Likewise, if the plot doesn’t have you running out of the theater, the appearance of the film will.
The dialog of the characters is fine, sometimes emotionless enough to make a clown cry, but always easy to understand. Like when Percy saw his mother get taken away, he shouldn’t be fine, he should be crying like someone stole his mom. The images shown are informative, not always connective to the story. Showing me the statue of Perseus and telling me that Percy was named after him wasn’t quite interesting, perhaps a clue that he’d be killing Medusa, but nothing I’d brag about at the dinner table. Graphics were a little distracting, and about the quality of a high school students’ project (especially that chunky hydra). Transitions of the different placing were awkward like a rollercoaster that only goes forward and back. The tone of the story was rushed, the story moving so fast and confusing that you might need a baggie by your side if you’re to get through such a tragic movie. The lighting was fine, but then again even a monkey can screw in a light bulb. Music seemed original, but about as complicated as a 100-piece puzzle. As a result as a less than mediocre setting, the actors had to be the light that pulls you into the bug zapper.
Okay honestly, Logan Lerman was quite a piece of eye-candy, like a delicious cherry red candy apple surrounded by those disgusting off-brand candies that you wouldn’t even want to donate to the food shelf. I quite enjoyed seeing him, if only he had acting skills. A good summer in a play with good directors could probably fix it. It’d have to be intense work, I suggest Winnie-the-Pooh. Alexandra Daddario I cannot grant such words. Sure, she’s beautiful like a model, but she can’t emote. She’s like a walking mannequin as she converses with Percy by the poolside in Vegas. As she was running from Medusa I questioned if she was distracted by the fact that her hair is brown and Annabeth is blonde. On the other hand, Brandon T. Jackson was emotional, but most of the time the same two emotions. Grover was either scared or determined, all day, everyday. The rest of the cast I don’t care to mention because they aren’t around enough to even bother with how much work they needed. It’s all about the main three, how predictable. Not even Harry Potter excluded that much (Malfoy, Dumbledore, Snape, Dobby, etc.). Yet there’s still an air about this movie that screams… Five dollar bin.
If you need a cheap laugh and an easy way to kill an hour, you could watch 'Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief'. Or, a much more entertaining idea, you could go read the book. It might take more time, but at least you won’t have to see the most horrifying sight ever… a hydra made completely of janitor power. Which raises the question, if the hydra had five heads (represented by the five janitors) when the new heads grow back, do you have more janitors? But I digress. To answer the question that was probably the reason you read this article, yes you should go watch this movie. To pay for Logan’s acting lessons.
Read more at Buzzle: http://www.buzzle.com/articles/percy-jackson-and-the-olympians-the-lightning-thief.html
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